Sometimes the most meaningful factors in a situation are not obvious.
In raising children the most meaningful factor is the strength and drive which parental love provides.
Parental love encourages a new parent who may feel overwhelmed by the sudden responsibility for a helpless human being.
Parental love convinces us to believe our newborn is “cute” and “adorable”, charming the parent to tolerate and overlook the cries which cause sleepless nights and the hours of strategizing how best to respond to a baby whose biological time clock is vastly dissimilar to those of the parent or parents.
Parental love also graces the child/parent relationship through disappointment and worry.
When a parent feels anxious because their teen may have friends who avoid life challenges or who are reckless, or when a parent worries how their son who has autism will handle job responsibilities or to be among people with whom he is unfamiliar, parent love surrounds these concerns with motivation to create a good outcome.
Parental love accepts and energizes the parent to feel good striving in the interest of their child, regardless of the child’s physical, interactional and cognitive abilities.
If this is so, then why do many parents distance themselves emotionally from their child who has autism?
The key variable is the degree of the withdrawing parent’s willingness to trust and work with their sense of parenting love through the additional effort and responsibilities connected with a child who has autism.
Parental love motivates a person to continue their effort to find a sustainable and reasonable way to keep connected with their child, despite tensions, sadness, or anxiety.
Willingness to love and lovingly be involved with one’s child is the area to examine and establish when life with a child who has autism feels stressful.
The joys and satisfaction of a reliable parent/child relationship, both short and longterm, merit your effort to love!